Archive for Positive mental skills

How to be with your feelings

How to be with your feelings

To let go of emotional eating habits, we need to deal with our feelings differently. How? This month, do this very simple thing: Let feelings arise, and acknowledge them. And doesn’t that already feel better? Me: baby screams. Feeling: Guilt that I can’t soothe her. Feeling:…

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How to cultivate pleasuretaking in your life

How to cultivate pleasuretaking in your life

Food is such an immediate pleasure. This month, let’s take the pressure off food and explore other ways to meet our desires and enjoy living 1.Paradigm-shift your pleasure. Think about how pleasure was presented to you as a child, and the rolemodels in your life….

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How to eat when you’re hungry, and stop when you’re full

How to eat when you’re hungry, and stop when you’re full

Specifically, for weight loss, here’s the intuitive eating holy grail: Eat when your hunger is at 80%. Stop when you’re 80% full, ie satisfied, but not stuffed. Let’s learn how to recognise the signs Do you ever find yourself eating in ’emergency mode’? I do…

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How to get into a great weightloss mindset

How to get into a great weightloss mindset

“ Guilt. Shame. Self-reproach. Self-policing. Powering through. Pushing yourself. Taking failure to heart. Wishing surgery on your body parts. Believing that you will never. Rushing. Setting unrealistic goals. Just generally thinking, actually. Stop that already.  Perceptual shift is key, if you want to lose weight…

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Why do I binge eat?

Why do I binge eat?

Binge eating and dieting – or even making up restricting food rules for yourself – go hand in hand. I know. I used to do it! Here’s how it works, and how to begin to react differently.  I’m talking to you now as someone who…

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There’s only fear and love

There’s only fear and love

I gingerly admit it: this is probably the most overtly spiritual post I’ve ever written. Try it out. And join me in wondering: What IS fear? What IS love?   There’s only fear and love. That’s the theory In other words, all emotions are underpinned…

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Actions speak louder than words

Actions speak louder than words

Maybe it’s because I’m a woman*, or poetically inclined, or a dramatist, or a literature student, or a writer – but words and what people say are important to me. But what if they weren’t? What if I just couldn’t ‘hear’ people’s words? What if…

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Waiting (or ’embracing timelessness’)

Waiting (or ’embracing timelessness’)

I used to love deadlines: found them energising, and focus-giving. I’d make up all kinds of deadlines for myself and stick to them religiously. Not any more! I was thinking about this while I waited for a haircut in a place you don’t make appointments,…

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How to know yourself without having any answers

How to know yourself without having any answers

I frequently hear myself jabbering on about ‘inner wisdom’. I’m more and more convinced it’s a real sense. How do you reach it? When decision-making is an agonising tangle What university should I go to? Should I take history or psychology for my humanities subject…

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Seven ways to make failure impossible

Seven ways to make failure impossible

We live by goals, targets, determination. But the trouble is, you either meet goals (success) or not (fail). And since failure is hefty, and willpower a limited resource, here’s another way to do life I’ve loved goals (I WILL draft a novel in 31 days,…

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